worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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