stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Sorry my hands just texted you
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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