I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
