And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
