:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
