I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
we're making bets on your personal life
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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