I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
