david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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