So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
