Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
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Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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