It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
