he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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