That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize