Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I just gift wrapped bread.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
soo... how was my night?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize