Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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