Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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