He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
