I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
