if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
