is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
