I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize