After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Randomize
