we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
