he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
Randomize
