I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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