Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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