In the future we'll all be gay
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
