She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
Randomize
