his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
