when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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