I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
My ATM looks so different sober.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
