puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
