How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
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Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
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Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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