I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize