Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
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