evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
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Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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