you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers