this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
