im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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