Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
