you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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