In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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