Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
