I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Found your dick twin last night
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
