were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
