He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
