im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
