So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
