big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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