Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
