In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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